Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Why I am NOT Going to See Courageous

Okay, let me just say before you start throwing rocks, I'm pretty sure I agree with the message of the movie and what it is encouraging men to do and or become, at least from what I can tell, not actually having seen the movie! But, for reasons that will soon be explained, I am not going to watch this movie.....

I've actually seen Fire Proof and while it was a bit tough for me to take Kirk Cameron seriously, my only previous exposure to him being on Growing Pains (if you've ever seen the show, you'll know what I mean!) I heartily agree with the message of the movie and am glad that it gained so much popularity and rejoice for any marriages it helped through hard times! But, it needled me just the same!

Now, on to the reasons behind this rather against the flow opinion I have!

Sermons (especially fathers day ones), the two above movies, how popular culture and yes, even the church, treats this topic, has become a pet peeve of mine in recent years.....what on earth could I be talking about?

It's what I like to call, the Man Up and take back your God given (or if your not in the church, just where ever you get the ideas of gender roles from) responsibilities. I can't count how many sermons I've heard on this subject, the men getting lectured from the pulpit about how they need to become better husbands and fathers. But, I can't think of ONE sermon or movie that tells us women how bad of a job WE are doing!

Yes, you read that right, I WANT to hear a sermon about submiting to the men in our lives, I WANT to see my nagging, belittling, prideful, selfish faults 20 feet high on a movie screen and then go and by the companion book, then hear about it in the sermon for the next few months!

I used to be quite the little feminist (in a very loose sense of the word mind you!) and sit there, a small smile on my face thinking.....yeah guys step up and do your job! Preach it Pastor, let em' have it! Take charge and raise your children, be the head of the household! 

But, a few years ago, I noticed that while the Mothers day sermon was all glowing praise of how great mothers are (or if not the subject of the sermon, they are at least asked to stand and clapped for!), the Fathers day sermon was yet another step up you lazy men, type of sermon. Hmmmm, something was not right here and so I started paying more attention and noticed that this wasn't just a one time thing, it was a disturbingly lasting trend!

The men are told through movies and from the pulpit to be "courageous" and us women go and watch these movies and listen to these sermons and leave feeling like we need to "fix" the men in our lives, if only they could step up and be like the men in the movie.

I have not seen one woman come away with the thought that maybe if SHE tried to change and fulfil her God given roles maybe that wold encourage her husband to do the same. But no, we just judge and shake our heads at the men in our lives. I have only heard 2 guys say how much they liked the movie Courageous, just 2! But, I have lost count of how many sighing I wish my husband was more like that comments I've heard from the fairer sex!

I'm not saying that the men don't need to be reminded that they need to step up and become Godly sons, husbands and fathers, but I would like to see some pulpit banging and convicting movies for us women to do the same!

So, girls I am asking you to stop focusing on how the men in your lives could be better, we need to focus on fulfilling our rolls as Godly daughters, wives and mothers. That in my opinion is the best thing we could do to encourage and support our men. We have to first submit, put down and step away from the men's repsonibilites so they can pick them up and become the men we want them to be!

So, to wrap up this alarmingly long post, why am I not seeing the movie Courageous? First off, the message is not directed at me, I don't need to know how to be a better husband and father! Secondly, in my own small way, I'm protesting what I consider to be an unfair bias towards men, and will be focusing on fixing my MANY faults and problems and then after I'm perfect, we'll see about watching the movie! ;-)